yalla ya Nasrallah - song

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yalla ya Nasrallah - song from Israel

A Sacred Marriage... VIOLATED; Reconsecrated.

Overwhelmed with emotion, I lightly sway back and forth. I bring the siddur close to my face, breathing in the worn pages of the machzor. My lids are drawn closed by tears welling in the corners of my eyes. The day has finally come.

I stand before my G-d with both awe and the sinking feeling of a minute puzzle piece in the impressive puzzle of a Master. I take full stock of what I am. A TRAITOR.

I am a wicked, selfish traitor. I do not deserve this wonderful husband of mine. Time and again I have displeased him, caused Him pain and grief.

Our marriage is sacred. One no one can break. Yet, I have managed to violate that which I hold dearest and most holy. My marriage to G-d.

As I come before Him, I am humbled. I do not express regret for specific sins I have committed. No. Now is not that time. He is not angry with me for sinning. He is saddened by my choices that have created distance between us. He loves me. How could I have been so selfish, uninhibited, and blind? So very blind…

As a wife, I look to dwell on the qualities of my husband, rather than on the enormity of my sins. My husband is incredible, so selfless, Divine, and endearing.

This year my prayers are formed in a slightly different chamber of my heart. I have definitely matured, yet with this newfound maturity, I have the astounding realization that I have so much further to go. Maturity of the mind, emotions, thoughts, and feelings.

And I will begin by consecrating my marriage to my Beloved, once again.

“Ani LeDodi V’Dodi Li / I am to my Beloved, and my Beloved is to me.”

The Sweetest Revenge

A STORY:

There was once an American farmer and a Russian farmer, both living in their respective countries. The American was out plowing his field when he saw his neighbor driving past in a brand-new Cadillac. The American farmer looked at his rusty, old pickup, then at his neighbor’s shiny, new car, and vowed, “Someday I’m going to have a shiny, new car just like his.”

Meanwhile the Russian farmer was plowing his field and saw his neighbor driving by in the fancy luxury car. He looked at his rusty, old pickup, then at his neighbor’s Cadillac, and vowed, “Someday he’s going to have a rusty, old pickup just like mine.”

Interesting philosophy?

The Russian farmer isn’t going to be any better off himself just because his neighbor loses his nice car. The instinct for revenge is strong. But in the end it doesn’t do a person much good.

THE BEST REVENGE IS LIVING WELL.

The greatest revenge is thriving. Getting back at someone for their wrongdoings at your expense is not revenge. You will, in no way, benefit. Revenge is achieved by looking within oneself and realizing that “I have the power” and really using that energy to reach all sorts of heights.

Think back to a time when you felt hurt. Cheated. Neglected. Insecure.

What was the first thing that came to mind? BLAME. It is completely natural to place blame on other people, situations, atmosphere, time, and especially family, yourself, or the way you were raised.

We all do it. But that doesn’t make it right.

We look at our lives and we think back, to all the things we did, that may or may not have been right. And think how our lives might be better if…

Not only does G-d have huge plans for us. That is true. But He also gave us the tools to make our own decisions and bring ourselves to the potential that He has in store for us. There is no one to blame for not performing our best. It is every individual's duty. Our mission.

Specifically, I am thinking about pain brought upon by another. That other person may justify what he has done to hurt you… And just as he justifies his evil doing, you need not berate yourself for your past evil doing (as long as you know that it was wrong, and that there will be no repeats).

But if you feel anger or hurt due to what another person has done to you – By hurting them back, you only hurt the other person. YOU do not become a better person from it.

Rather, and I speak to myself here, you must rise above it all. Don’t live at the low rungs they lower you to. Live life on the highest rung you can reach at this point in life. The ladder is endless – it reaches into the clouds, up into eternity. There is life to be lived. THRIVE!

THAT will be the sweetest revenge of all.

Let's Make this Very CLEAR!

I want to make something VERY clear.
My previous post was meant to point out the IRONY. Not to put down what I am doing, or what is going on here at all. It is 100% right and 100% my thing. I love it and plan to give my job my all!

The irony is that as we are maturing, kids are told to keep to their own gender and not to mingle with the opposite sex. Now, being that I have (hopefully) matured some, I am being entrusted with this amazing job of bringing Jewish girls and guys together. It is a very rewarding position - as program director - and I intend to do the best I can!

The Rabbi here is amazing. You should see him with the students. They all adore him. I was making phonecalls, and when I say that I'm calling on his behalf, they all get excited, "Oh?!" So I know that he is doing a great job here.

And BH... the girl I am working with.. She's great fun! Love ya, N!

We drive the most pimpish lookin' set of wheels, I tell you - drives real smooth - a COP CAR! Seriously! Her bro (previous owner) even placed this yellow light on it! It's great - wewewewewww!!!
Now, please help us with gas mula. Yah. Tenk you!

Now about the budgetting.. This is a first for me. Yeah, I should've been on a budget last yr in Israel (Thanks DAD! :)... But now I'm learning to be a responsible adult!
Oh no!!! I'm NOT turning 20... Help! Why do we have to grow up?? WHY?!!

Walking a very thin line...

Sometimes we think we are doing something right, when it is really very wrong.
Sometimes we fear that we are doing something wrong, when it really is very right.

If only all things in life were so clear cut...

There is a very thin line. There's no such thing as grey. At all. Rather, it is called a thin line. Why? Because the "grey area" leaves room for "greyness", whereas a "thin line" is a hair's breadth, and can lead one from the white zone into the black zone in virtually no time at all.

There IS black and white. The problem is that we are human. And since we are created as limited creatures, we cannot always distinguish the difference between what is black and what is white. Or we would rather not...

For example -
A religious Jewish girl knows that speaking with the opposite gender is a big "No No". So when it is on the protocol in the very supported world of shluchot (Jewish Outreach Program), the girl may very well feel confused. Why, all of the sudden is it not only OK to talk to guys, but even encouraged?

There are obvious borderlines - Do not go to parties. Do not get backed into a corner. Do not agree to meet him to discuss his "issues with Judaism". Do not give him your cell phone number (unless he's helping with some event obviously...).

But ordinarilly - No, I would not be all jolly, "Hey, what's up, Mike? Yeah? How's your semester going? And the (Jewish) fraternity? Cool. Yeah, glad you came tonight. Have fun!"

But all of the sudden - its SHLUCHOT. This is how we get them to drop everything they're doing and run to Chabad. Chabad is fun, cool, exciting, and easy! So why not?

I just need to keep in mind why I am here and what I am representing at all times. I never knew it would be this "involved", for lack of a better way to put it.

Good luck to you all in whatever outreach you are able to do. The smallest act can change a person's life for the better. For the best, see Chabad! :)